music makes everything better

May 11, 2008 candacemorris 4 Comments

for this melancholy month of may, i choose goldfrapp's new album, "seventh tree." especially today - especially just for this lyric:

"she's like a little bird
she flies from tree to tree
to see what she can see
she's far away from me"

i needed an escape. i took a green drive. it rained. it cried. everything was wrong. allison goldfrapp'ed me into her bosom and made it better.

i am a little bird. i am far away from me.

now, it's later. i am sitting in one of my favorite spots in all of eternity - my in-law's. (strange? you have to meet them to understand). The boys are playing some Tri-Ominos, I sit and gaze at this dreamy new cookbook my lovely devon gave me as a housewarming present...mmmmm, the food of france. the book could never be as lovely as my devon, but it's a damn fine present. what should i cook, my pets? how about some cauliflower soup? crepes suzette? maybe a light salade nicoise?


friends, it's hard to keep writing when what's inside feels unacceptable or unbeneficial to share. i want to do it anyway, because i really need it. so i guess... sorry, my loves, but this is for me. this one i am saving for my achy soul today. how i long for the release of soul that comes from the sweet sound of pressy keys and the scribble of pen to parchment.

for some of the first times in my life...i know it. i know anger.

it
feels
cleansing.

i guess
f
i
r
e
does
that
to
you.


some weekend highlights to share:
  • thomas street bistro. yes, it's on my street. joel and i are 2 for 2 on hoorah restaurants within walking distance of our abode. a shift in some really upsetting friday energy came in the form of a random $400 bonus that joel came home with....with accolades from his job. he then treated me to a meal out (a rather scary portion of income goes to our dining experiences, she confesses sheepishly). we lazed over a 3 hr meal, four courses, a bottle of wine, and fabulously cute frenchman telling us cute stories about his provencial town. we then meanderd round about ways to our house, stopping at an ivy-COVERED brick building that joel was very tempted to ascend. once we got home, we enjoyed a rousing game of boogle, and despite your guesses that i would win (due to my superb wordsmithery), we were tied.

  • my baby sister-in-law, julie had her bridal shower. as with most women in relationships where they are loved, she continues to grow ever lovleier and more whole.
  • an amazing saturday night meal with jason and devon. joel was very on his game and his cooking skills wowed us all. it felt so right to host our first dinner in the new place, and joel and i keep saying how much we love our home. we then took a midnight walk, the four of us, through our urban jungle and explored some gardens, mansions, and hanging ives and arbols. i found a tree that even now, one day later, is calling me...it muse that it will be my summer haven, my solstice where painting, reading, cloud watching, and grape eating will commence.
maybe you come out and play with me?


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4 comments:

Dearest Melancholy Month of May,

1. Salad Nicoise.

2. All feelings, good or bad, contribute as a whole to the lovely entity and overall growth of a human being. Write it down.
Heave your heart upon the paper and return another day to see where you have been and how much closer you are to the things on the horizon.

3. Where have you been all these years?

j~
i agree my friend. i know this in theory, and am vigligant with my own journals about it, but questioned a medium where people read and look for inspiration. basically, i hated life all weekend and wanted to just bitch about it, but was afeared for my lovielies - that my influence or negative energy would not help them...but i just had to do it.

i have been buried for most of my life, but it's a grand awakeneing and i am overly euphoric to share some of it with you - madam gumption. in a more practical answer, i was teaching high school english for three years about 2 years ago, so i had zero life. :)

BC said...

Zero life? I think not. Although I didn't know you at that time, it is hard for me to imagine you lacking "life".

As for venting about said life - vent away! There is nothing better than purging. Although you may see it as negative, and want to provide inspiration, some of us feel inspired by it regardless.

And I want to be invited if you make Salad Nicoise!

oh bc, you just make me swoon lately. thank you for your friendship...and let's kick kc out of town more often so we can really enjoy our illustrious affair.