friday night at dusk
here i am, sitting in the dusk, picking through the small dregs of the tortilla chips to dip in my hummus, occasionally turning my head to see Octavia jump up on a sleeping joel...
here i am, recovering an ailing head with water, reminiscing about the late night talks in the dark with some ladies, wondering why i cried so much, remembering why i love them, noting to drink less next time...
here i am, book open on bed ("How to Think like a Cat"), pondering the existence of a small feisty animal and how she will be in relationship with me for a long time, hoping i can read her signals, praying she will stop eating my curtains, relinquishing to an ugly scratch post...
here i am, irritated that i filled up my weekend so much, aching to spend it alone with joel, having just picked him up from the airport today, propositioning him with a night of girl movies (300 and The Notebook**), knowing how much i needed that week apart, warming to his electric touch, knowing i would die without him...
here i am, in quiet peace at dusk on a friday, amazed that a few months ago, i would be walking home in heels, exhausted from boredom, hungry for vodka and cheeseburgers, and expectant of some friday night life.
here i am, recovering an ailing head with water, reminiscing about the late night talks in the dark with some ladies, wondering why i cried so much, remembering why i love them, noting to drink less next time...
here i am, book open on bed ("How to Think like a Cat"), pondering the existence of a small feisty animal and how she will be in relationship with me for a long time, hoping i can read her signals, praying she will stop eating my curtains, relinquishing to an ugly scratch post...
here i am, irritated that i filled up my weekend so much, aching to spend it alone with joel, having just picked him up from the airport today, propositioning him with a night of girl movies (300 and The Notebook**), knowing how much i needed that week apart, warming to his electric touch, knowing i would die without him...
here i am, in quiet peace at dusk on a friday, amazed that a few months ago, i would be walking home in heels, exhausted from boredom, hungry for vodka and cheeseburgers, and expectant of some friday night life.
here i am.
i have begun to freefall.
i have begun to release my white-knuckled grip,
i have begun to think that...
i could get used to this.
and i'm lickin' my fingers with the goodness of it.
{WHICH MAKES ME WANT KFC FOR DINNER}
i have begun to freefall.
i have begun to release my white-knuckled grip,
i have begun to think that...
i could get used to this.
and i'm lickin' my fingers with the goodness of it.
{WHICH MAKES ME WANT KFC FOR DINNER}
~the no-more-corporate-whore,
crm
crm
**YOU MAY BE SURPRISED TO KNOW THAT DESPITE BEING AN ELITIST SNOB ABOUT MOST THINGS, I AM IN NO WAY AN ELITIST SNOB CONCERNING CINEMA. I USE MOVIES IN THE MOST ARISTOCRATIC SENSE: CATHARSIS. THE THEATER'S MAIN BEAUTY AND ART IS IN ITS VICARIOUS POWER TO ELLI CT A REACTION FROM OUR SUBCONSCIOUS AND PURGE US FROM THE PAIN WE KNOWINGLY/UNKNOWINGLY CARRY. GIVE ME A HALLMARK MOVIE CLASSIC, AND I'LL GIVE YOU A SATCHEL OF HEALING TEARS. FURTHERMORE, I USE MOVIES AS A MAIN IMPETUS FOR MY WRITING. WRITING SOMETHING THAT AFFECTS SOMEONE AS A MOVIE HAS JUST AFFECTED ME IS SOMETHING TO WHICH I GREATLY ASPIRE. NOTE: THIS IS NOT TO SAY THAT FOR MOVIES IN CERTAIN ARTISTIC CATEGORIES, THAT I HAVE NO TASTE, EDUCATION, OR STANDARDS. SUCH FLIPPANCY IS NOT SOMETHING OF WHICH I AM CAPABLE.
4 comments:
Hi there how are you? I was looking through your blog and found it interesting and wanted to leave you a comment.
I have an invitation for you to come and visit my art blog here in San Diego Southern California. I started this blog in an attempt at finding a creative way to find new friends, and explore my artistic skills through bloging. I have since found many new friends from an international audience. I hope you will stop by and enjoy the various labels and music videos I design for my art blog.
I hope to see you soon :)
freefall away,
unfold those wings;
you need not fear -
we're all in need of letting go,
falling into what seems unknown now.
It is a brave journey out; into living more and more and more.
You're my babe even though you are Joel's babe. I just think to myself:
What I wouldn't give to watch poppy-teenie-bopper-movies with that girl...what I wouldn't give to stroke Octavia's silky hide...what I wouldn't give to have been one of the girls in the dark watching your wine saturated tears fall down. Oh man. What I wouldn't give. I'm feeling far from you these days but so So SO close to you regardless. You know I'm sending you oceans of thoughts and hopes and prayers and laughs and sighs from Idaho. You know that right? I miss you and I love you and I see Seattle in my future. Seattle and you. One and the same. And me, the little Idaho potato with my face pressed up against the glass watching the rain fall down.
None of this is making sense anymore but I'm not going to edit anything I've typed. I'm not even going to read over it. Nope.
I think of you all the time.
You're my little star in the West.
XO
i can't wait to watch movies with you.
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