2 du la matin: J'écris
I should never be blogging this late, for inevitably I am maudlin. I have just finished quite a few episodes of my third run through of "Sex and the City," and before you roll your eyes, I think I have something to say that doesn't (only) include gushing over chanel, manolo, and dior.
I also willingly admit that I've shed a few tears (not uncommon for these leaky eyes) at a particularly well-written episode in season 6 (if you watch, it's the one where Charlotte has a miscarriage and watches the Elizabeth Taylor story, as well as the one where Miranda and Steve say "I love you" in the linen closet) and again the feeling of the profundity of storytelling descended upon me.
It always amazes me when I break it down. I just stared at a computer monitor for 1 hour and was completely attached to women that are entirely fictional, fabricated, NOT REAL. I have felt for them (and many many more) what I have felt for only my most intimate friends and lover(s). It's stupid and entirely remarkable. It's how I feel towards Jane in Jane Eyre or towards Cal in East of Eden, how Joel feels towards Spock and Han. We find absolutely real attachment to completely imagined people. The way I feel right now about the lives of four women is how I want people to feel about something I may write. To call forth tears from a living being because of something I wrote...to have them leave inspired, in awe of the power of words...feeling connected and empathetic towards something I created. This is truly a powerful thing. We get to live all the lives of all the fictional characters to whom we can relate, and this brings great healing, excitement, and perspective to my rather simple life.
I also willingly admit that I've shed a few tears (not uncommon for these leaky eyes) at a particularly well-written episode in season 6 (if you watch, it's the one where Charlotte has a miscarriage and watches the Elizabeth Taylor story, as well as the one where Miranda and Steve say "I love you" in the linen closet) and again the feeling of the profundity of storytelling descended upon me.
It always amazes me when I break it down. I just stared at a computer monitor for 1 hour and was completely attached to women that are entirely fictional, fabricated, NOT REAL. I have felt for them (and many many more) what I have felt for only my most intimate friends and lover(s). It's stupid and entirely remarkable. It's how I feel towards Jane in Jane Eyre or towards Cal in East of Eden, how Joel feels towards Spock and Han. We find absolutely real attachment to completely imagined people. The way I feel right now about the lives of four women is how I want people to feel about something I may write. To call forth tears from a living being because of something I wrote...to have them leave inspired, in awe of the power of words...feeling connected and empathetic towards something I created. This is truly a powerful thing. We get to live all the lives of all the fictional characters to whom we can relate, and this brings great healing, excitement, and perspective to my rather simple life.
To enrich a human life such as I am enriched in this very moment...
this, my friends...this is why I write.
that, and I would die if I didn't.
this, my friends...this is why I write.
that, and I would die if I didn't.
Here’s to the written word and the power of imagination,
candaceruth
p.s.
I am dying every minute I don't have my camera...
10 comments:
yup. i feel the same way. and your words make me feel something every time i read, which is why i come back every day - you're already a huge success there i'd say. and funny enough - blog reading allows me to feel empathy, love, compassion, etc etc etc for a whole bunch of folks i've never met - but these ones aren't fictional. which makes it even better - connecting with real humans is one of the greatest joys in life as far as i see it. hope you have a good day today!
I know the feeling. I have only seen parts of a few episodes of Sex in the City but did see the movie and realized I had been missing out. Loved it, and am excited for the sequal! Did ya here?
When I randomly found your blog about 2 months or so ago through Google, I knew after reading the first post that yours was one that I had to come back to. You write about the important, the honest, the true. I have no doubt that whatever you choose to pour yourself into will be made of the same. Your work is already inspiring and enriching. Now. It will be wonderful to see where your talent takes you!
I am such a silly girl because I often have trouble distinguishing between the real world and the wonderful world of fiction. Steve finds my ability to suspend reality both adorable and bizarre! Oh, I've cried over many many characters...Harry and Dumbledore, Frodo and Sam, Reepicheep...geez, I'm a geeky girl! Crying while reading a book in the tub is pretty much my favorite hobby.
Who is "Hans"? :)
I'm a Friends-era girl. I still think 'I wonder how old Monica and Chandler's twins are now'...
Anne of Green Gables! Oh my goodness, if only I could find my Gilbert...
I pine for these people I have never met, fictional or real.
I prouldy connect with Ms. Anne Elliot, Harold Crick, and the Tennenbaum family as a whole.
Not so proudly, I often miss my pals in the old 90210, way back in the day when Brandon was still in love with Kelly, and Brenda and Dylan were one hot item.
You make an imaginary and fabulous world of this reality in which we dwell. You make an oasis of Maple Valley, and a home of Seattle. So well done on creating a fiction-esque passion in me for this nonfiction life. The French intellectual and cultural critic Roland Barthes once wrote that a text of pleasure is "the text that contents, fills, grants euphoria; the text that comes from culture and does not break with it, is linked to a comfortable practice of reading." You grant us that indeed.
jordan- i was just thinking this last night as well - this whole strange phenomenon of the blog community. so many people (including my therapist) think it's a bit odd, but it is an ideal way for me to connect. After all, how would I have ever met you?!
Cassie- Oh yes. You need to watch all six seasons, but it gets amazingly good in seasons 4-6. Thanks so much for the encouragement...it means so much that you stumbled here and found inspiration. SO much.
kbl- oh me too! only not with, um, those characters. :) i love your geeky self. it's sexy.
leif-
oh my god. i am mortified. i actually made this mistake in a convo to joel the other day. he was funny about it...and i have remedied it post haste!
E- Exactly what I mean. Sigh.
Ed- Totally Anne of Green gables. TOTALLY!
B- All good choices, esp. Anne Elliot though you are in no way a wallflower or past your bloom! I remember that era of Brenda and Dylan...sigh.
Jim and Pam, The Office.
BSG, anyone. You know.
I miss your camera too!
Love you. See you soon. Might we celebrate your b-day?
First instinct, Batman. I can honestly say I have never cried over Batman, which really makes me question my total adoration. The ones that have made me cry? Paikea. I have met a few women in this world like her and I weep. Ivy Walker an absolute equative of hope whore. Has the soul of Batman ever been written? Is the daily angst struggle ever really known?
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