if we took a holiday...took some time to celebrate...
until this weekend, i didn't think the phrase,"i've had the best weekend of my life" could ever belong to this
cross
o
l
d
bird.
but it turns out, without even trying...
with (almost) zero planning and little agenda,
the family bookling (comprised only of monsieur and madame bookling as yet)
had one of
"the best weekends of their lives."
and need i mention how desperately i needed this?
i wanted to feel alive.
not pressed... squeezed...deflated.
so i went on this weekend trip with joel with little to no expectation other than for quiet and some loss of my ever-present self-consciousness.
aka. leave the ALWAYS REFLECTING inner-mirror behind.
and here it is, late sunday night - and i could just weep with inner fulfillment at this weekend. i could dance on my rooftop naked and scream that i am alive and gorgeous.
and ready indeed to take flight.
to feel some wind under my feathers.
to sing in the most irresponsible outfit of sequence and glitter
and skinny dip in the sea of moonlight
and should that be how one feels when approaching 30?
i think so.
cross
o
l
d
bird.
but it turns out, without even trying...
with (almost) zero planning and little agenda,
the family bookling (comprised only of monsieur and madame bookling as yet)
had one of
"the best weekends of their lives."
and need i mention how desperately i needed this?you see, this entire week past, i have been feeling the pressing in of time. it's no secret that i turn 30 years old in (T minus) 1hr and i felt upset most of the week.
and then i felt shame for feeling upset.
and then i felt shame at the shame.
you get the picture, no?
and then i felt shame at the shame.
you get the picture, no?
but i just DID NOT want to be one of those women who cry and feel their age and moan about the most natural thing in the world. i WANTED so keenly to feel that 3o meant i only became increasingly fabulous, lovely, centered, healthy, kind, tolerant, and intelligent.
but instead, i felt the anxiety of the F.L.E.A.T.I.N.G years to come and the gasp of "oh my god, what have i been DOING all these years? I'VE WASTED MY LIFE." also known as the bittersweet bookends of what has passed versus what is to come.
but instead, i felt the anxiety of the F.L.E.A.T.I.N.G years to come and the gasp of "oh my god, what have i been DOING all these years? I'VE WASTED MY LIFE." also known as the bittersweet bookends of what has passed versus what is to come.
i wanted to feel alive.
not pressed... squeezed...deflated.
so i went on this weekend trip with joel with little to no expectation other than for quiet and some loss of my ever-present self-consciousness.
aka. leave the ALWAYS REFLECTING inner-mirror behind.and here it is, late sunday night - and i could just weep with inner fulfillment at this weekend. i could dance on my rooftop naked and scream that i am alive and gorgeous.
and ready indeed to take flight.
to feel some wind under my feathers.
to sing in the most irresponsible outfit of sequence and glitter
and skinny dip in the sea of moonlight
and should that be how one feels when approaching 30?
i think so.
for those of you, like me...who want the nitty gritty details, read on.
the weekend started with me getting off work on Friday at 2pm, which is just divine...and i walked to and from work (2 miles, cheers to me) and got all of our stuff together. we got on the road and had a lovely listen to NPR and chatted and laughed.
We met Joel's cousin and his wife, Hanson & Caroline, in Bellingham for dinner and I enjoyed some much needed Aventinus and fish & chips. We then sauntered out to the boardwalk, and the sea stole my anxiety. The wind ruffled my dress and with each sway of the dock, I took big bites out of the cleansing salty air.
Joel and I left H&C and set up camp in the dark - jumping in our cozy sleeping bags and drifting off to sleep.
The next day, we went to the bay and scouted crabs and looked at clams, seagulls, egrets, and little fishys of the most curious nature. Afterwards, we walked back and made some delicious lunch, played cards in the sun, took naps, read books, took another nap, took a drive, found some ice cream, sat on the beach and read more, made a delicious steak dinner, read, had a campfire, and went back to bed - content and free.
Today, we woke up after a deliciously long night of sleep and took a long walk to the store because I had a hankering for chocolate donuts and coffee. We then tore down camp happily and drove down to some outlet stores on our way back to Seattle. We stopped at a casino for a beer and (more) fish and then joel spoiled me rotten at the outlets. I got a beautiful new dress for my bday and i finally purchased a skirt that is above the knee.
because
1 - i have worked my ass off loosing weight this year and
2 -it's about that time to show a little leg. i am 30 years old, after all.
If you should happen to see me strutting on the street, refrain from your hoots. It's terribly indecorous - instead envy me from afar.
We got home and unpacked and did a spot of laundry - and I was just easy, not irritable, and lovely. I love the effect this man has on me. We had some lovely conversations and I believe it's a husbands duty to help his wife remember that
Joel was feeling fine tonight in a new pair of jeans and shaved face, so we walked down to the movies to see Mama Mia. OH MY GOODNESS. (I know I married the right man when joel leaned over and asked, "is this a musical?" and when i nodded, he said, "YES!" excitedly).
On our way back from the movie, as Joel and I were practicing dance moves, I felt so euphoric.
And i want to pursue these interests more.
Tell me, loveies...how can i read/write, dance, sing, cook, drink, and still make oodles of money to afford my wardrobe?
Well, off i must go. AH! I just looked at my chipped finger nails. This will never do for a 30th bday. It's too late to remedy this - ah, damn.
there
goes
my
fabulousness.
~ euphorically yours,
the weekend started with me getting off work on Friday at 2pm, which is just divine...and i walked to and from work (2 miles, cheers to me) and got all of our stuff together. we got on the road and had a lovely listen to NPR and chatted and laughed.
We met Joel's cousin and his wife, Hanson & Caroline, in Bellingham for dinner and I enjoyed some much needed Aventinus and fish & chips. We then sauntered out to the boardwalk, and the sea stole my anxiety. The wind ruffled my dress and with each sway of the dock, I took big bites out of the cleansing salty air.
Joel and I left H&C and set up camp in the dark - jumping in our cozy sleeping bags and drifting off to sleep.
The next day, we went to the bay and scouted crabs and looked at clams, seagulls, egrets, and little fishys of the most curious nature. Afterwards, we walked back and made some delicious lunch, played cards in the sun, took naps, read books, took another nap, took a drive, found some ice cream, sat on the beach and read more, made a delicious steak dinner, read, had a campfire, and went back to bed - content and free.
Today, we woke up after a deliciously long night of sleep and took a long walk to the store because I had a hankering for chocolate donuts and coffee. We then tore down camp happily and drove down to some outlet stores on our way back to Seattle. We stopped at a casino for a beer and (more) fish and then joel spoiled me rotten at the outlets. I got a beautiful new dress for my bday and i finally purchased a skirt that is above the knee.
because
1 - i have worked my ass off loosing weight this year and
2 -it's about that time to show a little leg. i am 30 years old, after all.
If you should happen to see me strutting on the street, refrain from your hoots. It's terribly indecorous - instead envy me from afar.
as a side note: if you have never shopped with Joel - you need to sign up here.
We got home and unpacked and did a spot of laundry - and I was just easy, not irritable, and lovely. I love the effect this man has on me. We had some lovely conversations and I believe it's a husbands duty to help his wife remember that
she does not bloody up everything she touches.
and that the care she gives to others,
the work of her hearth and home,
the tears that fall when she thinks he can't hear,
and the dreams she whispers in her sleep
are noticed, lovely, and enough.
and that the care she gives to others,
the work of her hearth and home,
the tears that fall when she thinks he can't hear,
and the dreams she whispers in her sleep
are noticed, lovely, and enough.
Joel was feeling fine tonight in a new pair of jeans and shaved face, so we walked down to the movies to see Mama Mia. OH MY GOODNESS. (I know I married the right man when joel leaned over and asked, "is this a musical?" and when i nodded, he said, "YES!" excitedly).
Another side note:
show me a man who can
chop wood, get a theological degree, build houses, tile showers,
cook, shop, teach, dress well, fix cars, play chess,
clear hay fields,
make beer,
speaks french,
loves musicals, theatre,
computers, children, people, laughter
and classical and operatic music
...and I will swoon all the way down the asile to him.
AGAIN.
show me a man who can
chop wood, get a theological degree, build houses, tile showers,
cook, shop, teach, dress well, fix cars, play chess,
clear hay fields,
make beer,
speaks french,
loves musicals, theatre,
computers, children, people, laughter
and classical and operatic music
...and I will swoon all the way down the asile to him.
AGAIN.
On our way back from the movie, as Joel and I were practicing dance moves, I felt so euphoric.
And i want to pursue these interests more.
Tell me, loveies...how can i read/write, dance, sing, cook, drink, and still make oodles of money to afford my wardrobe?
Well, off i must go. AH! I just looked at my chipped finger nails. This will never do for a 30th bday. It's too late to remedy this - ah, damn.
there
goes
my
fabulousness.
here's to the you that dances around your house
in something rediculous
with your round brush microphone,
"you are the dancing queen...."
the you when no one is looking
is my favorite
you indeed,
in something rediculous
with your round brush microphone,
"you are the dancing queen...."
the you when no one is looking
is my favorite
you indeed,
~ euphorically yours,
10 comments:
"You know that woman made me understand... ....it takes a woman's love to make a man." -Kansas
Happy Birthday to the most wonderful 30 year old lady girl I know who is svelte, smart, sensitive and superb in every way!
Also, that is EXACTLY a husband's job. To a "T". I'm sure you let Joelio know that he does a good job in this respect, but let him know this for me:
"Thanks Joel, for being a man who knows how to be a man."
yes, my morning tears cry, yes.
it's a beautiful thing when a human embraces their destiny...and my deepest pleasure to see it unfold before my woman eyes.
plume, you have quick access to my soul. how did you weasel your petite self in?
happy birthday! Lauren and I enjoy reading your blog hope that you are doing well never forget to say hi when you come to visit Jackie and for the record 30 is still very young to do all the things in life that you could ever want. Its just a number, not how old you really are.
Happy Birthday my sweet! 30 is the new 20, and you are rockin' it! What a great camping trip. Joel is a fantabulous man and I'm glad that he has you to bring it out in him.
Happy birthday again!
What a wonderful man Joel is!
Here's to many more fabulous years!
Happy Birthday!
Age is but a number. Instead of counting the years, count the friends that you hold dear.
(besides, you're making us truly old folk feel bad ;-)
Emily
Oh lovely,
Thank you for the most beautiful luncheon celebrating your birthday.
How on earth did we find such incredible men who remind us just how INCREDIBLE and TALENTED and PERFECT we really are (Joel - I love you for who you are!)? I think it has to do with the fact that you (and I) are truly worth it, no contest about it.
You are amazing, and 30 is gonna be one f-ing fabulous year!
yeah, no CONTEST! what sSHEEE said.
Candi, I'm so glad that you and Joely had some fun together. Happy birthday to you, pretty lady! Steve & I will be calling you later, but I'm sure that you'll be celebrating in some crazy way...so we won't be hurt if you don't pick up. When are you going to Redding? We need to coordinate lunch, ok?
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