Brace Yourself!

JOEL AND I ARE GOING TO FLORIDA!

(lidda, send me an email about getting together!)

Okay, it's just Florida, but it is exciting nonetheless.  I'm tagging along with Joel on a business trip of his as we celebrate a belated anniversary.  Miami is boasting 75+ temps, so I'll be sure to get some much needed sun and sea.  Oh, and also...Cuban food!  Aye, aye, aye!!!  I take off on Sunday, and am rather excited not only for the trip, but also to continue in my January photo challenge with a new cuisine and much more color.

Additionally, I wanted to take a few minutes to boast about my friends over in the Daily Bread flickr pool.  DUDE...these people eat well!  You should pop over and take in the inspiration, but I must fairly warn you...do NOT go look if you are in any possible way hungry.  It's just painful.   Here are a few collections:

MMM.  Dessert.

{ 1. The Pav, 2. lovely yammy biscuits, 3. Eatin' up the Antioxies, 4. rum cake glaziness }

MMM.  Drinks.

{ 1. My Taste of Late, 2. medium, dark, light, 3. I like my tonic with gin and lime, 4. 01.08.10, 5. Nourishment, 6. some love it, 7. Wine in a Jack Daniel's glass, 8. Drink your greens, 9. His and Hers: Cocktail Hour }


 

MMM. Hot.
Also, we certainly love our mugs.  It's kinda of an inside thing with us.
{ 1. Strange Brew?, 2. a proper tea, 3. Cafe Nico, 4. just a light conversation over lattes, 5. 01.06.10, 6. hot pink hot chocolat, 7. 01.02.10, 8. January 2: Happiness comes from contentment, 9. Breakfast of Champs, 10. Devoured, 11. Hello Lover, 12. clovesgingercardamomblackpepper, 13. Breaking the Fast }




MMM. Color.
 { 1. did you know, 2. Lunch Break, 3. Custard tart, 4. suppah jan 4, 2010 }


GO HERE TO SEE ALL THE PHOTOS!

Also, I forgot to mention a rather important thing the saint and I decided to do this month.    In an effort to break our winter habit of watching too much 30 Rock and movies, we decided that after dinner, we were going to turn off our computers and television and really unplug for the night.  Instead, we sit by the fire and read, or play a game, or split a bottle of wine and talk, or go out with friends, or go to bed early.  It's amazing how setting aside time to get bored can really nourish the soul and squelch anxiety, though I admit that it's still terribly difficult.  I am breaking the rules tonight because I just feel lousy, so we gave ourselves a night off.  Joelio is sitting here watching a Japanese movie and I am bundled up with my sniffles.  So far, it's been such a wonderful month.  I really don't want to become one of those couples who simply do not know how to hang out with each other.  It's also been quite amazing what you find to talk about when there's actually empty space to nurse your thoughts aloud.  I highly recommend some sort of unplugging.

This last week, I had some thought that simply would not stop harassing me.  They were just the kind of thoughts that annoy most, you know, the ones you thought were totally done with you.  All through my morning coffee, poached eggs, and prepping my menu for the week, I couldn't shake it.

I listened to these thoughts.

Some nagging news precipitated these musings which sent me reeling into a past that I had distanced myself from.  A past which carried the old familiar news of me being a shitty friend and distant female.  The news was nothing really shocking or surprising in and of itself...but it sent the stinging reminder to my soul that I no longer had a friend that I once had.

It's been a while since the first thing that came to mind when I screwed up or disliked my actions was a message of self-loathing.  Half of the pain from the week was the realization that mizz nasty still lurks somewhere down in those murky places my soul has yet to reveal to the light.  I hated myself with vehemence for a past version of me that I couldn't control.

So I sat at my desk.  Lighted a candle to help me find something sacred there and I wrote.  I threw down page after page of all the things you are never supposed to say.  It felt good, but wasn't enough.  I looked up and saw the road beckoning me.  I stashed Ariel into my pocket, hastily donned my hat and scarf, and tromped outside.

For some reason, this toying with paradox really helped give me some rest.  We cannot help what has been done, but I do believe we can do it justice by wrestling with it until it screams uncle.  I had to go into the forest because I had to honor that an old friendship with its old issues and old blood was not done with me, nor I with it.  So I jumped right back into the murk of it (one does not easily forget) and though I found absolutely no answers, I saw myself more clearly.

I saw myself more kindly.

I was home.

On Monday morning, perhaps the most commonly dreaded morning in human history, I was awakened at some unnoticed hour by the most gentle rain on my roof, the most fragrant coffee dripping into my carafe, and my husband gently encouraging me to awaken.  As I stumbled out into the living room to sit upon my chair and read my book, I heard that the saint had also turned on NPR for me and poured me my coffee.

I really am reveling in this time, fear not, oh jealous ones.  I am most certainly not used to people envying my life, hell...I even envy my life...this is quite surreal.  However, I must assure you all that I am doing all that I can to absorb it, to live it, to make it everything it could possibly be.  Well, at least I am for today.  Tomorrow, I'll probably get antsy, have an existential crisis, feel lazy, and complain...but that's what the gin's for...

This weekend, the saint and I made it into the city to shop and dine...my life is such a paradox of headed to the mailbox in my pjs and headed to the city in my knee socks. 

Also, look at our most revered visitors last week!! The saint snapped these shots while I was out gallivanting at the illustrious Costco.