the gratitude list
contentment, like most virtues, carries with it a juxtaposition. One on hand, i never want to embrace the contentment that brings complacency (just so you know, i am not capable of complacency - i can't even get bored without becoming suicidal. (not funny, i know) ) I mean to say that I enjoy that I am not content with life - for I was made for something more...something other.
i realize also that contentment and gratitude are different - but in my quest to find my gratitude, i only find this gnawing discontent...and it has bled into all the other corners of my life of late.
i need a dam,
a thick, high stone wall built from fire
i need some mortar to fill in the leaks
bind up the cracks and make the good
then i can have a safe oceania of swimable contentment
can you build this for me?
i know the answer already.
i must learn to do it myself.
I hope you can find one or one thousand reasons to meditate on all the gifts of your particular existence. I think I will take one item from my list per hour tomorrow - to focus on the gratitude for that particular gift. Yes, that suits me perfectly...a good way to build a dam, don't you think?